HAPPY HOLIDAYS!

happy-holidays

Hello loves! I’m hoping that all the prep work for the holidays are coming along just as you’ve planned and better even.All the christmas shopping and putting up of decorations and such, oh during the most wonderful time of the year! Even if your plans aren’t working out as expected, don’t worry. As long as you are with family and loved ones everything will turn out just fine because quite honestly that’s all that matters. Being surrounded by the ones that you love, who love you in return is the best gift that we could ever ask for as we wrap yet another year that, surprising again, has flown by so quickly. A year that was full of happiness and grief, mistakes and success, growth and perseverance because here we are! What better way to end the year than with the people who stood by your side through the ups and downs of this past year. This is my son’s second christmas and while we are not going all out with the decorations or visiting the tree downtown and seeing the pretty lighting on the houses, we do want him to feel the specialness of this time of the year.

Today’s blog isn’t going to be about much. I just want to wish you all a Merry Christmas/ Happy Holidays. Continue to stay positive and loving and spread those two virtues as much as you can even if you don’t get them back in return. It is only week three of the revival of my blog and I’m thankful for all who have been reading and I hope that you continue to read. I’m also happy that I’m still at it and I hope I stay motivated to keep at it. Let me know what you think I should write about for future posts and/or comment whatever you’d like. Share with me in the comment box down below what the holidays this time of year mean to you.

I hope that you have accomplished all that you had set out to this year and more! If not, then just tackle it next year with 10 times the force!

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On that note, Happy Holidays everyone and an even happier and prosperous New Year!

Don’ forget to check out my last post! Shaking That Feeling

Toodles! 🙂

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Shaking That Feeling

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I think it goes without saying that procrastination is the spawn or evil or better yet the very thing itself, eating away at your ambition, restricting the potential greatness in us all by planting tiny seeds of self-doubt, negativity, laziness, you name it! I’ve been thinking lately that, this thing usually hits us right when we are about to kick ass at a project that we’ve been anticipating to get started or an assignment/test that you that little demon know that you are going to ace, with a little studying of course.

If you’ve read my recent post, A Day In The Life… Leave Your Expectations At The Door, it’s obvious that I’m still adjusting to being the mom of a one-year-old toddler while working part-time and I’m a full-time English major as well. If it may seem like I’m complaining while other women are juggling much more, you can just hop off because FYI I’m killing it in this game too. (If you’re not a parent, no offense but, don’t judge me.) What’s even more obvious though, is procrastination at it’s best I guess, preventing me from being an, even more, kick-ass parent/individual than I already am. I’m really trying to stay in a positive headspace.

A friend brought it to my attention that a lot of discipline is going to play a big part in kicking this guy to the curb. It’s not like I didn’t know this but you know. Remember when you were a kid/teen and used to suck your teeth on all the times your parents would send you to bed early even though it wasn’t a school night. And remember when they would wake you up before the crack of dawn even on the weekends. ? What about when they used to tell you to pick up a book or send you to some educational camp during the summer and to iron your uniform and sometimes even theirs for school or work every night or all at once on the weekends? I’m sure I can go on and on but you get the jest of it. That was the discipline that they were trying to embed into us. I’m not saying that I’m only realizing this now, but I really am just realizing this only now. My mind was against this for such a long time that I’ve given into bad habits. Instead of allowing those tasks to mold me into a more productive and more ambitious adult, I have given easy access to be possessed by this monster. We’re still talking about procrastination here. Stay with me.
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Anyways, last week I started up my blog again, the first time since 2015 and if you haven’t, you should go read those as well. A lot of that is due to my ability of not being able to commit to certain things once I’ve started but come to think of it maybe, just maybe it was our deadly friend that we’re talking about right now. Any which way, that talk is one of an entirely different post or maybe I’ve posted about it before. I’m not sure. So, after posting last week I felt really good about myself and felt a sense of fulfillment. I’ve been wanting to post for a while now, ever since I started my creative writing course this past semester. Also, we are in the final weeks of the semester so there’s been a bunch of final essays and exams to prepare for. I decided that if I wanted to ace these then I most definitely had to sacrifice something. I took off these two weeks of work (I only work on the weekends because of baby and school) so that I could go out to Starbucks or the library for the entire day leaving the baby home with his dad. I eventually decided that I need to shake this thing if I’m going to make the kind of progression that I need.

The first weekend has passed and I must say felt great being able to have some time to myself to dedicate to school work and it sure was productive. It made a difference. When the week started and I realised how much I still have to get done, thoughts of pushing back the deadline I set to have this post up and while I was in my Literature class I realised that nahhhhhhh, I’m already on a roll and there was no way that anything was going to rain on my parade. The next weekend is coming up and I’m hoping it will be even more successful than the previous one.
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Being realistic in the midst of all the self-doubt and anxiety, that little period of productivity, mindflow could not have been possible if I was in the same room as my son. At least, not yet and I’m working on that. He requires a lot of attention as do all toddlers, and my instinct is to give it to him each and every time. I can’t ignore him or leave him to play on his own because he isn’t at that stage yet where he doesn’t want to be up under me 24/7. I am so grateful for his father understanding my request for some “time off.” I really needed it. As much as we are believed to be superhumans WE ARE NOT! A lot of people are really good at multi-tasking life especially with a tiny human being depending on you for everything, but there are also those who just can’t and that’s okay. And at some we all need help. If the 10 million things that you are trying to juggle are becoming overwhelming, ask for help. Pride can also hold us back from our full potential but, it’s okay to show a little vulnerability sometimes because we are only human. There are a lot of people who I still won’t ever ask for shit but you get where I’m coming from right? Great.

Anyways, guys, there’s a pep in my step and I hope and pray that I keep it up because I really like the feelings that are associated accomplishing a task. Knowing that I can be a mommy and still do my own thing without feeling like I’m going to fall to pieces or like I’m failing, is very reassuring. It’s going to take a lot of discipline and help but steps are being taken to rectify all the wasted time I guess. No more letting this little demon deter me from the things that I have set out to accomplish. And remember, if you multitasking isn’t your thing or you’ve tried and it doesn’t work out for you then, take your time and do that shit one by one. Just make sure that you get it done because the feeling alone after you’ve completed it is so rewarding. You’ve gotten enough of my life procrastination and now, I’m taking it back.

Toodles for now! 🙂

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A Day In The Life… Leave Your Expectations At The Door

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I started writing what should’ve been a blog post about a month ago. Maybe it is a little more than that but back to the point. It was supposed to be about time management and the steps to go about achieving a more successful and productive, less bummy day. The idea seemed cool and exciting at the time but it felt like a waste to write because I wasn’t staying true to the words. Why in hell would I post something that I find sooooo hard to practice? Of course, I wish I could stick to those step, maybe even start with one at least but that isn’t the case right now. Continue reading

And I am back… 😇

This summer…. Woooo boy this summer. It was something else. It really was. A lot of unexpected experiences occurred, some of which I am grateful for and others which were just… But these things we do not control right?

Losing my grandmother and having to deal with a bunch of family matters really opened my eyes to a different side of my family. A side which I am not very proud… A side that I’m not proud of at all. They defy the definition of “family” or at least what I always thought the definition to be. It bewilders me that at the end of the day they say that what they said, done and are doing are for the sake of “family”. Baffoonary!!!

Anyways, I met Eddy!!! 🙂 and Cookie 😉

This summer all in all wasn’t really as bad as last year. It was less stressful and I had way more fun than I had anticipated. I even recorded a song! *yay me*

Something else that my eyes were opened to is that I’m still as confused about myself as I’ve ever been. Well maybe a little better than I originally was but confused and unsatisfied none the less. I hate that. It can’t be like this next year. At least by the end of this year, I hope to see change. I plan to work towards it.

I basically missed my entire blogging 101 course because I hardly had internet access and when I did… Lawwwd the speed na min all that. Sigh. I hope to catch it next time around.

I’m not sure what else to write about right now. I’m just tired of laying like this because I’m posting this from my phone. Next time I’ll tell you guys about my actual fetting and drama from being back hone this summer. :D😂:?😎😧😋😍😜😩:roll:😁 <—— listen to the emojis.

Till next time! Toodles!! 🙂

It is a sad day right now. Although I’m excited to see my family I don’t feel like I’m ready to go leave my other half for so long just yet. It is slightly depressing know that there will be no physical contact (its not always about sex) and very limited virtual contact. The struggle!! Anyways, as for my blogging 101 assignments.Those might be put on hold for a while due ttek the fact that I may not have much internet access during my visit back home. Ugh!

Sigh

Toodles for now!